wild*life

On Sunday we went to Jakey’s friend Brady’s third birthday party at the Children’s Discovery Museum.  It was all about dinosaurs, those little roll-up party horns and unnatural colors of frosting.  After we got hopped-up on sugar and paraphernalia dinosauria, we decided to check-out the museum.

Jake’s favorite stop was at the wheel of a real fire engine.  Nate’s favorite stop was the “no shoes” infant climbing room with carpeted ramps, steps and plexiglass walls.  He was so emboldened by his ability to speed around the baby maze that for a few short seconds, he forgot his fears, limitations and negative self-talk and took at least 8 steps in a row… before noticing that he was walking… thus crashing back to earth (well, not really crashing as Nate is highly coordinated and really just adeptly lowers himself back to a kneeling position).

I wonder how many kids can say they discovered walking at the Discovery Museum?  There’s an ad campaign in here somewhere…

Last Friday I received the following video from Miss Dulce at lunchtime:

http://youtu.be/wed_o_xb6JQ

It started with him laying on his side to look up at us.  It was so funny— like a little super model posing for the camera with a hand behind his head and the other on his hip.

Then he started dragging his little legs behind him.  And finally he was crawling and I wished I could stop time.  He’s now so fast, with his hands turned in slightly.  We’ve gone through a long period of constant standing.  And there’s the climbing… that deserves its own separate blog.

Now Natesy is on the verge of walking.  Two weekends ago he stood by himself without touching anything and scootched one foot.  Last weekend he took two steps while Nonna and Papa watched via the iPad.  By the way, where is the FaceTime record button… hello Apple programmers?  I know Steve Jobs didn’t believe in market research but you have to admit… this is a brilliant idea and now you’re wondering why you didn’t think of it…

This week he’s been leaping from the couch to the table with a couple steps in between.  He’s gaining so much confidence that tonight I caught him on his tiptoes, attempting to use the microwave.

“Mama, I’m the Daddy froggy and you’re the Mama froggy.” (squeaky voice which I guess is how amphibians and puppies talk)
“OK.”
“What are you doing Mama froggy?”
“I’m changing Nate’s dirty diaper.”
“I’m the Daddy froggy.”
“Oh good.  Then how ’bout you change Nate’s diaper.”
“Nope, I can’t.  I’m the Baby Daddy.”

Those Baby Daddy’s… never there when you need ’em.

This week we got a flier with Jacob’s first pre-school assignment.  I thought I had at least another two years before I’d have homework hanging over my head again…

So, instead of blogging I should be creating a poster that is all about Jake’s life up until this point.  James got clarification from the prof, uh Miss Chethi, today and we are to include JJ’s bio.  I’m thinking of something like:

Jacob James Fucillo showed-up 10 days early on Saturday, March 14th, 2009 in Mountain View, California.  He was aiming for Friday the 13th.  As a Pisces, he rarely exits the bathtub of his own accord.  He has several nicknames including JJ, Jake and Jakey (Cakes).  When he is grumpy, his mom has been known to call him Crab Cakes.

Before attending Saint Elizabeth’s Day Home, he studied under the tutelage of Dr. Seuss,  Patricia and Richard Scarry and Mother Goose.  He works in Santa Cruz at a highly top secret job— something to do with jet shoes, horses and broken computers.

His favorite foods are chocolate, cupcakes and chocolate cupcakes.  He lives with his baby brother, Nake, and his Mommy and Daddy in San Jose.  In his free time he enjoys making soup, building barricades and “driving” his dad’s car.

I had lunch with my friend Clara today and she told me her second grader has already given two Powerpoint presentations this year.  We were attacked by a crazy case of the giggles as she told me about their foray into a multimedia deck on “Harry the Dirty Dog.”  Apparently the teacher pulled her aside and suggested incorporating more clip art…

James has been checking my blog visit analytics and apparently one of my highest hits is for “tooth chart for children.”  Number 1 is “weimaraners dressed as people”… go figure.

So here I am, juking the stats for more visits from total strangers who will hopefully become hopelessly obsessed with reading original anecdotes and autobiographical confessions… propelling this page to one of the most addictive Mommy Blogs according to Parenting magazine.  Studies no doubt show long term sleep deprivation is directly correlated to delusional aspirations…

Natesy currently has 3 teeth on the bottom and 3 teeth on the top.  I’m not really down with the tooth lingo, but I have to comment that I found a “deciduous tooth” chart… I didn’t know teeth were like maple trees.  And then I just noticed the “exfoliate” reference below.  Perhaps I’ve been thinking of the Tooth Fairy as a distribution specialist when in fact, she’s more of an esthetician?

Last weekend Jacob and I were learning and practicing the concept of rhyming.  Bee, Tree.  Log, Frog.  He’s been quite the fan of repeating, “Yummy in my tummy!” ten gazillion times— one of those catch phrases he brought home from school.

So, I ask him, “What rhymes with Jake?”

Without hesitation, “Nake!”

It’s a big election year.  There’s the incumbent, who clearly has strong name recognition, years of experience and some wealthy backers.  And then there’s the up-and-comer.  He doesn’t play by the rules.  An outsider.  The “Maverick” if you will.

Blue versus Red.

Who will be elected President of mess-making?  It’s a tight race.

The candidate who says “No to high-speed rail!” and decimates the project in a pile of wooden rubble?  Or the candidate who pledges to put an end to the passage of spicy foreign imports, sweeping them to the floor with unmatched rage and indignation?  The candidate who vows to end homelessness via couch cushions and afghans, or the green candidate waging war on stray junk mail and product catalogs, ripping them to shreds?

Decision 2012: I think it’s likely to be a hanging chad year.

Shining a light on bullying has been all the rage… that and apparently there’s some new trend in child rearing where you have your baby sleep on a mattress on the floor, rather than a crib, so as “not to constrain them.”  Thank you to my friend Sarah for making sure I’m up on the latest in alternative parenting…

So back to bullying.  Happens to just about everybody.  For some, it can scar them for life.  For others, it remains a dark cloud over the adolescent bliss that is Junior High (Ah, Letti… you know what they say about karma…).  Worse now that kids can torment each other via text message.  And I had no idea it could start so early.

A couple of weeks before his third birthday, Jakey started the transition to the “preschool” classroom.  The stakes are higher.  You have to be potty trained, you eat in the cafeteria and you learn double-digit numbers.

I get home one night and Jake recounts the following story to me:
“Mom, the kids were making choco lattes today at school.”
“Uh, huh.  They were making cho-co-la-te?” (Spanish pronunciation)
“I wanted to make choco lattes today.  And the kids, the kids told me I was too little to make choco lattes.”
“They did?  That’s not very nice.  You make chocolate all the time.  Then what happened?”
“They told me I was too little and I had to go back to the little kid classroom.”
“What?  They said that?  What did you say?”
“I said, no.  No, I’m big!”
“That’s right, you are big.”

It’s probably important to note that this new class is made-up mostly of little girls, who are the same size or smaller than Jacob.  Who knew “go back to where you came from” could start as young as two?  James had a little “keep an eye on it” talk with Miss Chethi and Miss Hedidi (That’s what Jacob calls his other teacher, Miss Letti.  Coincidence?  Perhaps he was born with an innate sense of the injustices that were forced upon me at the age of 13 and therefore cannot pronounce her name in good conscience.  At least that’s what I’ve decided.)

Miss Chethi said she witnessed what was going on a day or so later.  As she put it, “You don’t need to worry. Jake can handle himself.”

Those little girls better keep an eye on their choco lattes.

I am hungry.

Every night we sit down to dinner and there’s a little birdie in a highchair, bouncing up and down and making monkey sounds until I shovel bite after bite into his open mouth.  When he’s decided he’s full he spits it back out just as fast as he was swallowing it one spoonful before.  And then the windshield wipers come out until every speck of food has been swept to the floor.

Meanwhile, Jakey has eaten all of his steak and vegetables and is leaning over, beginning to scarf mine down.  James is smart.  He eats his up right quick.

The last time we had spaghetti, we all agreed that one package is no longer enough.  You should see how much the little one can pack away.  And apparently Jake ate half a pizza one night this past weekend.

Last time we went to Kelly’s, Jacob told me not to order him the kid pancakes.  “I want the big ones.  The big pancakes.”  There is no kid’s menu… he’s been polishing-off the adult size all along.

Natesy’s started at Jake’s school now and fortunately they have a food program.  I think we’ll be getting our money’s worth.  The day form came back on Monday and it said Nate ate 200 graham crackers.

Maybe it was a typo… maybe.