A long, long time ago… back when getting email was thrilling and Amazon was our favorite rainforest, I lived in a townhouse with Alesia, Jenny, and Karen. Melanie lived next door and Jill was always over. The townhouse was just around the corner from Nate’s school. I was eighteen, it was our very first apartment, and I was a sophomore at Cal Poly. Remember how it goes? Freshman, sophomore, junior, senior.
We’d just moved in and there were a bunch of boys across the driveway. Their second story porch faced our second story porch. One day I proposed we make chocolate chip cookies and introduce ourselves. They ate our cookies, told us their names, and we gathered they were from the Central Valley. Auntie Karen had already taught us we were from “The Coast.” Most of them wore baseball hats and drove big trucks. They said “ammond” and we said “almond.”
A day or two later, we heard a commotion. There was shouting and laughing and the general sound of shenanigans outside. We rushed to our upper porch to look out and see the boys across the driveway. They had a big, ugly recliner chair and were hoisting it over their balcony… they cheered as it crashed in the driveway in front of our garage. What do you think those twenty-one year olds were drinking? Yep, they were drinking beer. And yes, alcohol can make people do crazy things.
They thought it was so much fun that they ran outside and carried it all the way back upstairs so they could throw it over again. Then they threw a rice cooker over the railing. We found out they were mad at their roommate who’d left and hadn’t paid his rent.
And that’s how I met your dad.
Actually, first I liked his friend, Scott. Scott was cute but he was famous for his stinky feet. Seriously. But after my birthday in October, Scott mysteriously stopped coming around. Later I found out Dad had a talk with him in the quad at school and scared him off. Something about how I wasn’t the kind of girl you just casually date. And then one night I couldn’t find my drivers license (sound familiar?) and so I went into the garage to check Harrison Ford. That was the name of my Ford Explorer. Dad followed me downstairs and kissed me in the passenger seat and that was it, the end. I’m kidding!
I’ll never forget the day we were driving in his truck on Highland Avenue and he told me his favorite pizza was ham and pineapple. Jackpot.
I loved that Dad was a lefty, like you JJ. And I loved his kind brown eyes, like yours Nate. He could raise one eyebrow and he had a dimple in his chin. He also had this annoying habit of clicking the cap on his highlighter in class. He was smart and funny and so proud when he got a better grade than me in Business Law. And even though he beat me, one of the first things he taught me was that we were always on the same team. That’s where our family motto comes from: Brothers Stick Together. Because you are a team. And we are a team.
One of our most special moments was after we were almost two years into the pandemic. Dad and I were lying in our bed upstairs and we could hear you both talking to each other in your beds in the dark. You’d spent SO much time together and yet you still had things to talk about.
And I had that with Dad. I could talk to him forever. We never ran out of things to talk about.
And we never ran out of things we wanted to do together.
We wrestled marlin with Papa and Uncle B in Mexico. We nodded off on the second story of a red double decker bus ride around London. We ate chocolate lava cake every night with Emily in Paris. Dad visited me when I lived in Spain and people would elbow me out of the way to ask him things in Spanish. I spoke WAY better Spanish. We got married at Kennoyln. On our honeymoon, we slept in an Italian grandmother’s attic where we had to take showers in a hall closet. We went to New York and Oregon and Yosemite and wine country. We loved old houses and good food and exploring.
One time we went to a country bar in San Jose called the Saddle Rack. It had dancing and a bucking mechanical bull. And Jennifer Anne, Alesia’s little sister, really wanted to ride that bull. She told Dad. I found out when he came out of the bathroom wearing… wait for it… a jean skirt. He gave Jennifer his jeans so she could ride the bull and he put on her skirt. Isn’t that the funniest thing? He wasn’t worried someone would give him a hard time for wearing a jean skirt at a country bar. He was all about helping people do what they wanted to do.
Then he surprised me with a trip to Peru. We climbed the peaks of Machu Picchu. And then we came home and started our next big adventure– Baby Jacob.
And JJ, you were a force. You knew what you wanted and you were determined to get it. One day I came home and you and Daddy were hanging out. And you know what you were doing? Dad had invented a new game. You were running back and forth in front of the big window in the living room… with your mouth open… chasing this slow fly. Trying to catch it. I was completely grossed out. You and Dad thought it was hilarious.
And then almost exactly two years later, Baby Nate was born. And just like he’s one of the fastest out there on the soccer field, you came into our family crazy fast. At the hospital, Daddy turned around and there was Nate. Dad was still wearing his backpack. He hadn’t even had time to take it off.
The four of us set out on a new set of adventures. We chased squirrels at Happy Hollow, and birds at the San Francisco zoo. We went to the beach and ran away from the waves. Nate would scream “Run for your lives!” We ate francese toast with smoked salmon and poached eggs at Kelly’s in Santa Cruz. We had water fights in the backyard and picnics in the front yard.
Dad and I had even bigger dreams. We wanted you to have more space and more sky. We wanted to build a house from scratch. And we wanted you to grow up in a special community where you could go to Farmers’ Market with your friends, and baristas at Scout would ask me if I was Nate’s mom. So we set a goal and we made it happen. We packed it all up and moved to San Luis.
Where we created even more stories. We built the barn and opened Office Hours. We went to Pennsylvania and Dad lit fireworks on the dock at Flatrock. We went dogsledding in Banff and he took you snorkeling in Maui. You ate all the things at Disneyland. He shared your love of Marvel movies and taught us about the Premier League and trained you to arrive early, to make eye contact, and to thank your coaches.
And all of this time we’ve had a beautiful, joyful life. We’ll continue to have a beautiful, joyful life. Things will happen that we can’t anticipate, or that we don’t want to happen. But we’ll figure it out.
Like we did this Christmas in Yosemite. When we got to the Valley floor and our tire chains had flown off? And there was a blizzard. And we learned that people are kind and generous. And we are resourceful and resilient. And we can reassure all these loving people here today that we are crazy strong and smart, and good with YouTube. That we’re going to be more than OK. Because we’re a team of All Stars, and look how many fans we have.
And this entire story has taught us we have everything we need right here inside us. You HAVE the best dad. And he is part of us. I see him in Jacob’s creativity and entrepreneurial spirit. And your cute swoopy nose. And I see him in Nate’s big toes, your generosity, and your ability to learn everything there is to know about soccer. Dad is always with us in our hearts. We will love and miss him forever. And he’s taught us everything we need:
- Brothers Stick Together.
- To spend our lives with someone you never get tired of talking to.
- To dream big dreams. Never put those dreams on hold. Set goals because you choose your own adventure.
For the longest time, I was so worried about losing Dad. I just couldn’t believe the story of Jaimie and James would end.
And then I realized the story of Jaimie and James isn’t one story. It’s hundreds. It’s thousands. The story of Jaimie and James is the story of Jake and Nate. It is all the past memories and future stories that we have with every person here.
So that’s what this story is. It’s a Choose Your Own Adventure. And just like our favorite books, this story is a cliffhanger.
Duh duh duh.
And like all good cliffhangers, I can’t wait to see what happens next.
To Be Continued…
Love you always, Fucillo Family!