No Treble

I’m music illiterate.  Honestly.  I learned about Gangnam Style from kids on Jake’s preschool playground.  I kept asking, “What are they saying?”

Well, technically I can read music… many years of piano lessons and I was first chair flute in eighth grade.  Ask me to tell you the story about my music teacher sometime— it’s a good one.

When I say illiterate, I mean, as in I have zero idea who sings what.  Unless you count Lionel Richie and Shakira songs.  But only Lionel… The Commodores?  Who?

Growing-up, my dad listened almost exclusively to classical music.  My mom liked Grover Washington, Jr., Sade, and Kenny G.  I once missed the high school party of the year to attend a Kenny G concert with the fam.  And I vividly remember going to the mall and having to ask the sales lady if they had the CD, Between the Sheets by Fourplay.  My mom requested it for her birthday.

As previously described, I lived in the boondocks.  I don’t remember getting a lot of radio stations, though I do remember Casey Kasem and Love Songs with Delilah.  How old is that lady?  My first cassette tapes came from my grade school best friend, Zoe.  She introduced me to Whitney Houston, Huey Lewis and James Taylor.  In fourth grade, my best friend, Nealy, introduced me to reggae.  But mostly I remember the music our body-builder au pair, Kevin, listened to on our way home from school.  It was actually really great to have a male babysitter.  He taught us to play chess and video games and the importance of physical fitness.  On the music front, I specifically remember the lyrics of two songs he liked, She’s a Maneater and Get your money for nothin’, get your chicks for free.  Good stuff.

In college, my roommate had control of the stereo and ultimately, what it played.  One day I made a conscious decision to stop resisting country music and embrace it.  I mean, I was at Cal Poly.  It was Alan Jackson’s “Little Bitty” that finally turned me.  “A big yellow bus and little bitty books?”  I love everything miniature, how could I not like it?

And speaking of country, when Jake was three I started paying attention to the musical selections on our radio.  As clear as a bell, one day he sang from the back of the car, “Got a little drunk last night.”  OK, country music is not nearly as family friendly as those red states would have you believe.

Nate’s favorite new song is Meghan Trainor’s, All About That Bass.  He sings it “Baba Base, Baba Base.  No trouble.”  I’m pretty sure he thinks it’s about milk sippy cups.

And then tonight at dinner Jake sings, “‘Cause I got that boom boom that all the boys chase… And all the right junk in all the right places.”

Hey Mom, can I borrow some Kenny G?