The Last Sucker

I’ve come to an important decision.  And set a date.  And that date is tomorrow: May 1st.

Loud Voice of God from Above: Tomorrow IS (dun dun DUN), Operation Bye-Bye Nigh-Nigh II.

Our little Natesy Cakes has enjoyed his pacifier habit long enough.  He’s two ‘n change, he speaks quite a bit of English, and I’m letting him keep his “baybit” addiction (a mini green down comforter that he became attached to during the Ice Age of 2012, See Episode 5).

On the English speaking front, I feel like we’re definitely living on borrowed time.  It’s bad enough that we’re going to hear “I waaaant it” endlessly for the next week, if we wait any longer, he will undoubtedly pick-up his brother’s relentless negotiating tactics and wear us down through interminable verbal torture and perseverance.

Of course I’m not making him go cold turkey.  Though I’m also not planning on the imaginary nigh-nigh fairy to come save us.  We won’t be mailing them to a baby near you.  Or leaving them for baby giraffes at the zoo.

I like the old, “Huh?  Your nigh-nigh has a hole in it?  That’s strange.  That’s the only one I can find.”  (Followed by wide-eyed look of complete innocence and an empathetic pat on the head.). “Now off you go.  Buenas noches.”

So tonight I’ve lined-up the three remaining nigh-nighs as a sort of pacifier last supper.  Nakesy, you choose: Will it be the tricolored one that is the newest and therefore least likely to be biodegrading invisible plastic chemicals into your pristine little system, the yellow and green one that I chose as the only gender neutral option for sale at Targét, or your favorite: dual shades of pink?

After much deliberation and a lot of feigned indecision (this is really just a bedtime stalling tactic), he chose pink.  I knew he would.  For some reason it seems to taste the yummiest.  A fine choice.

I just re-read the original Operation Bye-Bye Nigh-Nigh and it looks like it took two entire weeks.  I’d forgotten that part…

Lord help us.