Dirty Laundry

I do my best not to publish our dirty laundry on the internet– though it is tempting.  When surrounded by little boys, there is no limit to the number of embarrassing incidents and humbling anecdotes that are best not documented for the entire world to read.  Now with that said… here I go:

One of our favorite family rituals of 2011 has been waking-up on a weekend morning, driving the hill to Kelly’s Bakery for breakfast on the west side and then grocery shopping at New Leaf.  I must put in a plug for New Leaf as the unspoiled, crowd-free alternative to Whole Paycheck.  Jake can run through the aisles, barely harassing a soul.  I love it.  Except for inadvertently buying a jar of organic almond butter for $24– we’ve only had positive experiences with New Leaf.  Fortunately they accepted the return of said platinum-infused sandwich spread without hassle.  It had to have contained precious metals, right?

So back to my story.  We eat our usual deliciousness and Jake and I decide to go outside to chase birdies while Daddy and Natesy finish-up.  We’re in this very cute boutique store and Jakey is being so good “Not touching anything because it’s fragile, Mama?” when my cell phone rings.  In a tone I can only describe as irritated desperation, James implores me to meet him at the car immediately.

Jake and I show-up in our naivete and Nate is half naked on the tailgate on a brisk December morning, as I have the diaper bag.  Please pardon yet one more tangent…  when Jakey was a little baby I clearly remember one changing table incident I’ll describe no further than to say: Armpits.  OK, back to the tailgate.  If Jake can be summed-up as Armpits, Nate can be summed-up as Ankles.  There wasn’t a shred of clothing that survived.  Normally I would be prepared for such calamities, but I seem to have gotten overconfident.  We had to wrap a naked, freshly diapered Nathaniel up in a blanket and take him grocery shopping.  James was mortified to report on the state of the high chair he had frantically vacated–  when I heard this additional detail I must admit, I almost peed my pants laughing.  I really hope we can go back without being recognized.  You may find us at Gayle’s Bakery for the next few months…

It seems that was day one of Nate’s first bout with the stomach flu.  After a four outfit day yesterday, today I wised-up and dressed him in camo.