Hot Diggity Dog

Mickey Mouse is taking over my life.

It’s a little fuzzy, but I do remember life before Mickey.  Probably about a year ago I was at the Uffs’ house and the older kids wanted to watch some show I’d never heard of: Mickey Mouse Clubhouse.  I wasn’t really paying attention, but I distinctly remember this song that went “Hot Dog, Hot Dog, Hot Diggity Dog…” (http://tmbw.net/wiki/Lyrics:Hot_Dog!)  I figured it was just a song made up for that particular episode (alas, I was mistaken).  It was horrible and of course, the hook was so strong that my brain replayed it all night long and into the next morning.  I remember smugly thinking, “Oh, thank goodness we don’t watch this Mickey Mouse nightmare at my house.  Not going to happen.”

Ha!

Whenever you find yourself thinking a self-satisfied thought about parenting, be prepared to eat your words… for breakfast, lunch, and snack time.

Someone (throat clearing) has programmed the Tivo to capture Handy Manny and Special Agent Oso… which apparently play ten times a day because anytime I’m trying to watch something, the TV hijacks my show and goes straight to the Disney channel.  It’s driving me freakin’ mouskacrazy.

The following statement poses a high risk of me being disowned by my in-laws, but there’s just something about blogging that requires you to confess your deepest, darkest thoughts: I’ve never been into Mickey.  Ever.  Please forgive me!  I don’t know if it’s his little girl voice or his tight black jeggings?  We just never hit it off.  I’m more of a Donald Duck gal.

And now Mickey Mouse Clubhouse has cemented our relationship divide.  Meeska Mooska Mickey Mouse?  Mousekedoer?  We got ears, say cheers?  We’re splitting the scene, we’re full of beans?  Oh toodles?  There’s just too much to comment on so all I’ll say is: Oh toooooodles kind of sounds like tools, but not really.  Not at all actually.

Before he was even two years old, Jake was riding in the car with his dad and exclaimed, “Daddy look!  Mickey Mouse, on the bus, right there!”  And of course he’s more inclined to wear his overnight diaper because it features his favorite Mousekedoer.

My MBA program seemed to be a three year study of Southwest Airlines with a brief mention of Disney.  I want my money back.  Any company that can develop this kind of brand recognition and loyalty, before the age of two, deserves more air time in graduate student classrooms and corporate conference rooms.

Meeskegibberish.  Mooskecrazy.  Mouskebillions.