Fucillo Family Weblog

Our life is changing…. again.  It’s clear that our previously oblivious, spacey child is starting to become accutely aware of his surroundings.  Last Tuesday we were playing on the floor and Jake got ahold of my iPhone.  He turned around and I kid you not, pointed it at the TV and pounded the front.  When nothing happened he dropped his arm, took a hard look at it, and then raised it back up at the TV.  Note to self: Jakey is 10 months, 2 weeks old.  (No I don’t have this memorized… BabyCenter.com tracks the age of my child so that I can always cheat in case my brain has devolved into sleep deprived baby oatmeal.)

So, given this new level of awareness, James and I had better clean-up our act!  Over the holidays we watched a somewhat unremarkable movie with Casey Affleck called Gone Baby Gone.  I wouldn’t mention this movie except for its highly notable use of replacement word censorship.  They did not resort to the overused “beeeep” or silent cut-out.  I was quite taken with the sophisticated and most generous use of “freakin’” and “bullspit.”

So in the spirit of Gone Baby Gone… which is actually quite aptly named for this blog as it perfectly sums up our freedom of speech, or lack thereof.  Here’s our short list of potential substitute swear words:

Bulls*#$: Bullspit (One of my new favorites.  Thanks Bennifer.)

Shut the f&*% up: Shut the front door (I must give credit to the terrific writers of the TV show Castle.  One of James’ faves.)

F*#$ you/me/it/that: Freeeeench toast (Not sure of the origins but this one is growing on me.)  My mom swears she has always been an extremely liberal user of the word ”fart,” but I’m not convinced.  I’m sure it started when I was 10 months old.

S*#$: ? I have still not found a replacement word that is as truly satisfying as this old standby.  Suggestions?

Today is the best day of my life.

Okay, that might be over exaggerating, but it’s definitely up there.  The first wash cycle has just finished on our brand new Bosch dishwasher.  James came home to Jaimie singing a little song, doing a little dance, and generally putting on a gleeful musical show for Baby Jacob in the kitchen.  Jake is also obsessed.  He has run his fingers carefully over every edge, caressing the front with a gentle and loving touch.  My boy.  Though he seems a bit disturbed by the new red laser-like light that shines on the floor.  For me, this light is like finding one last surprise present in the bottom of my stocking…  a solution to the infamously quiet dishwasher problem of my former life.  Now I have a fail-safe way of not opening the front when it’s still on, causing a loud waterfall like sound followed by “Jaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaim…  how many times are you going to do that?”

A sincere thanks to all those that have made this day possible.  I am forever grateful.

1) We brought in the New Year with a celebration of love at the Pie Ranch “Party”!

2) We splurged and enjoyed all the tweezer food Thomas Keller had to offer at Theee French Laundry during our last kid-free getaway.

3) Ten days early (but still miraculously timed between quarters), on March 14^th, we welcomed Jacob James Fucillo into the world.  Yes, we could only agree on Jake and thus became one of “those families” where everyone starts with “J”.

4) Jaimie finally got to drink that beer she’d been craving for 9 months.

5) After the trauma of the glow worm and the tanning bed, we told Jakey’s jaundice buddy, Billy Ruben (bilirubin), to hit the road!

6) We continued our commitment to eating locally and feasted at two Outstanding in the Field dinners.

7) We relished our new found ability to dress-up an unsuspecting baby in accessories and costumes.  Easter gave us “Easter Bunny Face.”  Halloween gave us “Giraffe Treats.”  What’s in store for Christmas??

We had way too much wine and wished there was more food at Bonny Doone Winery for James’ birthday.

9) Jacob was ¾ angel baby, ¼ devil baby on his first of many trips to Flatrock.  He was first to spy Juan the Bear at Sutton, take a turkey roaster bath, watch his Dad and Granddad nearly blow-up the dock, and toast the engagement of Uncle Geoff and Auntie Angela.

10) Jaimie started her blog, “Jake: A Mom’s Opinion” at www.fucillofamily.com.  She’d like to thank her loyal fan.

11) James continued his pledge to “Habitat for Jaimie” and moved everyone and everything into a Spanish Revival Bungalow.  Jaimie remembered too late that she hates moving, but pleads insanity based on the lure of 7 closets and a garage.  Please note our new address: 1474 Shasta Avenue, San Jose, CA 95126

12) We turned our lights out after the candy mania of 700 trick-or-treaters on our new street.  Thank goodness the neighbors warned us…13) Jaimie finished her MBA at Santa Clara University.  Now she’s a master of administering business, or something.

14) The death of Longs Drugs.  We’re still in mourning.

15) It was the year of the freakin’ Swine Flu– who could forget?!

16) Sliders became the new Cupcake.

In less than 9 months Jake went from a quiet little baby to a rolling, crawling, tongue-clicking, clapping, standing, flirting, waving, quacking, rubber-ducky eating monkey!

Happy Holidays to our dearest friends and family—may 2010 be filled with equally thrilling memories. 

Love,

James, Jaimie, & Baby Jake

So today is the last day of Jake’s very first Christmas vacation.  I’m not sure he relished it as much as he should have…  Yes he slept in a couple of times.  Yes he enjoyed some Christmas cookies and other indulgences.  But really, it didn’t seem like he relaxed at all.  And no, he didn’t take care of any of his unfinished projects…  but, here’s a recap of what he did do over his two week holiday.  Which I guess is a lot given he’s 9 1/2 months old…:

* Visited the toy store with his mommy and daddy to pick out a truck.  Was not interested in the $20 dump truck.  Was interested in banging two $.5o pieces of wood together.

* Wrapped presents with Mommy from the comfort of his Baby Einstein.  Sang the same Christmas carols One Miiiiiiiillion times.

* Enjoyed his first Christmas dinner at his Grantmother and Granddad’s house.  Loved Pennsylvania dried corn.

* Attended the Harbor girls Holiday Hoopla at Mel’s house.  Potentially put the moves on Baby Chloe during the group picture.  Tortured little Mayme with her string of beads in a rendition of an elephant and a mouse.  Seriously stunk up the living room.  Met Jenny’s boyfriend Steve for the first time (who I thought looked justifiably frightened)…

* Thought Christmas Eve morning present opening was clearly to celebrate the Baby Jakey, not the Baby Jesus.  Crashed before it was over.

* Stared in wonderment when the Jantz’s Mennonite carolers paid a magical visit to his Nonno and Papa’s house and sang ten rounds of Joy to the World (who knew it had so many verses… and that people actually knew the words to these verses?) and Silent Night.

* Was surprised by another Christmas morning present unwrapping event.  Enjoyed the paper, ribbons, and boxes more than the presents.  Crashed before it was over.

* Hit his Christmas party limit at Aunt Laurie’s house.  Crashed before it began.

* Chased his cousin Covi around under the dining room table.  Tortured Covin as he tried to protect all his cars (Lightening McQueen and Mater) from “Baby Jakey.”

* Maybe ate cat food at the new renter’s house.  Ate dill pickle with his Granddad.

* Learned to stand on his tippy toes to see on top of tables, figured out how to flush the toilet at Disneyland’s Paradise Pier hotel, perfected the art of rolling a ball back and forth to Mommy.  Oh, and now “dances.”

* Enjoyed Mommy’s heavenly beignets in Downtown Disney.  Get your own bag!

* As we went into the hotel restaurant for the Mickey & Friends breakfast, Covin announced gleefully, “It’s Tits!  It’s Tits!!” (translation: Stitch).  Jakey was sure Tits was definitely an alien and wanted his mommy to protect him.  Mommy wanted Jakey to protect her– an alien wouldn’t hurt a lady with a baby, right?

* Went on Pirates of the Caribbean,  Buzz Lightyear (twice), Toy Story 3D (twice), Jungle Cruise, It’s a Small World (Christmas version), the Choo Choo (posed for two pictures by a Japanese tourist), and A Bug’s Life 3D.  Pirates didn’t phase him… but was a teensy bit scared by the bugs.  Mommy was really scared by the bugs.

* Papa fed him an organic cereal puff and said he felt like a priest.

* Developed a drool induced rash goatee.

* Crawled all around the Grand Californian hotel lobby with Auntie Alesia.  Never once looked around to make sure his mommy and daddy were still there.  Made three little girlfriends: Livy, Rose & Shay (who gave him his first sticker).

* Seemed relieved that Christmas vacation was over and he could finally get back to his Caltrain naps, favorite school, and his own bed.

As a follow-up to the pine needle incident…

That evening Jake was super happy and crawled and played and wrestled with abandon.  Yet all of that exercise and happiness did NOT lead to joyous, uninterrupted slumber.  It felt like Jakey woke-up every two hours.  Crying and sputtering.  In the fog of sleep, all I could think about was maybe he can’t sleep because there’s a pine needle lodged in his throat?  Maybe it’s stabbing into his little esophagus…  Could it puncture the lining of his stomach?

James thinks it’s hilarious that he knew this is exactly what I was thinking.  HA HA.

My son just ate a pine needle.

It’s Sunday, January 3rd and our Christmas vacation is coming to an end *sigh*.  Fortunately I go back to work for one day and then we’re going to Disneyland!  N-e-way, James and I were busy taking down the tree.  The teeny little tabletop tree we chopped down at Culver’s with my mom this year.  As always, Jakey is playing underneath us, having a grand old time with the silver bead garland.  And then… I see his wet little hand grab a big pine needle.  You know, he palms it off the floor since his finger/thumb combo isn’t that reliable yet.  And then he deftly shovels it into his mouth in the exact same motion he uses for organic cereal puffs.

I quick try and get his mouth open but he won’t budge.  It’s very much like the scene in my favorite holiday movie, Elf.  Will Ferrell eats cotton balls at the doctor’s office like marshmallows.  Gulp!  This is exactly the image of Jake with pine needles.

All right then, if I can’t get it out then let’s wash it down with some water.  Apparently washing down a dry pine needle with water insights significant gagging, gurgling, and gutteral noises.  But fortunately not the insta-tears from Friday when I took dried cat food out of his hand.  I’m pretty sure he got a piece of that down the ol’ hatch before I noticed, too.  You’d think I had literally taken candy from a baby… not salty little tuna-flavored kibble.  This kid will eat anything… more on that later.