Pirates Don’t Change Diapers

My polling turned up two pirate books… which I guess is what you get when you poll pirates.  Did I ever tell you the story of the time 9 or 10 of us girls dressed-up as pirates and floated down the Truckee river?  I’m fairly certain the bachelorette wore an eye patch and a blow-up parrot on her shoulder.  Yes, there were pirate beverages involved.  Back to our G-rated content…

I was secretly hoping this book, Pirates Don’t Change Diapers by Melinda Long, illustrations by David Shannon, would have some kind of influential potty training theme.  No such luck.

In a nutshell: Our sometimes cute, sometimes pop-eyed protagonist Jeremy Jacob let’s the same group of unsavory types enter his home to babysit his equally gnome-like sister Bonney Anne.  You’d think with all these double-named kids they’d be from the South, but I believe they’re just from SoCal.  Contrary to the title, the pirates do change diapers.  In the end, they take their treasure back, but leave the two kiddos with a special birthday present for their mom.  Again, serendipitously, the mom’s favorite color is green… just like Jacob and me.

Families can talk about: Why are pirates always saying “argh” and what is “swill”?  Why can’t we see the pirate babysitters “sitting on babies”?  They can also talk about why the dad is taking a nap while his son is letting toothless, gape-mouthed seaman in without asking permission.  Most importantly, they can try to answer the question, “Why the pirate in the potty?”— followed by an explanation of a peephole— followed by such uproarious laughter that the rest of the story is marooned.

“What is mawooned?”


Illustration by David Shannon, Pirates Don’t Change Diapers.


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